


Far Too Young to Die

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Boys Love - Freeform, Fluff, M/M, Yaoi, kinda cute, this was supposed to be a fucking one-shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-13
Updated: 2013-10-14
Packaged: 2017-12-29 07:09:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1002437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brought up by an unfortunate series of events because of Eren and his Titan, he and Corporal Levi must spend the night outside in the cold rain, eight miles outside of the walls. When Levi falls asleep, Eren does everything he can to keep his commanding officer warm for the night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Cold Lips and Warm Bodies

**Author's Note:**

> Why did this have to happen? Why can't I finish other shit? Because music. This entire fic is based on "Far Too Young to Die" by Panic! At the Disco. So yeah, if you're into that type of music, totally listen to the song on repeat while reading this. Or not. *crawls into bed*

Eren felt almost as though he were under water. The muffled screams and crashing sounds behind him did not leave an impact, as he didn’t even turn to examine the wreckage that followed behind him. He didn’t feel the need to see what he had caused—no. He didn’t feel at all. The high that had washed over him from the heat of his titan form getting to him was too much, but he didn’t care. All of the screaming from Jean, or Armin, or even Mikasa coming from behind him didn’t matter.

He didn’t feel it when he smashed into countless trees or when they were launched out to his sides, he didn’t feel it when he stepped on crushed stumps that would normally feel like a human foot stomping onto the quills of a porcupine. He didn’t even feel it when the hooks of someone’s gear had shot into the back of his head, or when he was cut out of his titan’s neck. He didn’t feel it when he was draped uselessly in that someone’s arms, nor when they swung away from the falling, crashing, and evaporating body of his titan. And he certainly didn’t feel it when he was thrown against the trunk of a big-ass tree and kicked in the ribs multiple times.

He didn’t feel it, because this was only a memory. He didn’t feel it, because it had already happened. All he felt now was the pain that remained from everything that had happened in the past four hours. The running, the swinging, the jumping, the transforming, the howling that came from his titan body, everything. His ribs ached, his head hurt, his entire body burned, and he couldn’t open his eyes. He refused. He refused because he knew exactly what he would see. Feeling returning to his body finally, his pain escalated and nearly electrocuted his body as it intensified. The burning now felt as though his skin were melting off, his pounding head receiving force as strong as ten million bricks being chucked against his already boiling and bruised flesh. Everything hurt.

At least, however, he regained his other senses as well as touch and feeling. First, the sense of taste; he slowly slid his tongue around the inside of his mouth, scrubbing gently against his gums, then the roof of his mouth and his teeth, tasting the remainder of blood from his hand from when he had transformed. Next was his sense of smell; Eren inhaled the sticky aroma of his own sweat mixed with blood with an earthy-dirt smell. He assaulted the ground beside him, feeling cold dirt underneath his fingertips that lead onto rugged, uneasy rock the farther back that he moved his hands. Letting out a breath and trying his damned hardest to ignore the intense pain he felt all over his body, he lift his hands to the wall-like structure of sandy, sharp rocks he sat against. As the sensations pour over him and the pain began to die down, the next sense that came to him was sound. He could hear the light sound of his tingling finger tips against the rough rocky wall, his hard breathing, the sound of his poor little heart beating against his aching ribcage, and the faint dripping of water. Listening closer, he discovered that the breathing was not just his own. It was time, he had decided, to open his eyes. Perhaps, just perhaps, it wouldn’t be what he expected?

All he saw was darkness. Of course, his eyes had to adjust since they had been closed and locked in his own thoughts for the past few hours. Once they had adjusted, he examined where he was, took in his surroundings—rounded, rough, rocky walls about as big as his cell back at the Corps HQ, with an opening half his height adjacent to where he had sat. It was pretty dark outside, where the opening lead to, but he could see the rain hitting the ground in front of the opening. A cave? He questioned thoughtfully, wondering how he got there, how long he had been there, and when it started raining.

Eren adjusted his sitting, shifting his weight into his legs as the burning on his skin settled to a small sting. He was on all fours now, crawling tiredly toward the opening of the cave, hoping to get some cool water for his burning throat. He extended both arms, the left aching to the point that it shook, cupping his hands as they retained water for him. He brought them to his mouth and gulped the water down, and repeated this until his arms were soaking wet and the fire in his throat had ceased.

“Oi… Eren. You’re awake, finally?”

The familiar voice startled Eren, and he jumped. “Heichou?” He whispered, almost hoping he wouldn’t get a response. 

He looked back behind him, near where he was sitting, and just a few feet away from where Eren had been sitting against the wall in a looked-to-be-dead state was the Corporal, cold expression as always and he was cloakless. His face was scratched up on the left side, his hair disheveled; his clothing drenched in blood that Eren assumed was the Corporals own.

“Come here… I’m cold.” Eren froze at the sentence, calculating its different meanings, but not moving to do anything. Levi continued, his voice a shaky growl. “Give me my cloak back.”

“Your cloak—” It was then Eren felt the fabric draped around his shoulders. It wasn’t his own Corps cloak? No, he had left that back in his cell back at HQ. “Oh… Why’m I wearing this, sir?”

Levi shifted his position, slouching less and spreading his arms out in front of him and arching his back like that of a cat, then resumed sitting straight against the wall. Eren crawled back to the man while he had been doing so. “You were shivering, brat.”

Brows furrowed and the skin above his nose crinkling, Eren handed Levi his cloak back. “My skin was burning.”

“Yeah, well, you were fucking shivering and looked like you were cold. Next time I won’t give a damn.”

“Sorry,” Eren whimpered, moving back to his place against the wall where he first was. “Heichou, how did we get here?”

“You just woke up, brat, so I’ll remind you and your toddler mind: I am not a fan of twenty questions.”

Sighing, Eren pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, left still aching like hell. “Okay, okay, sorry.”

The cave grew silent, only the sound of their easy breathing at the rain as companion to their ears. After a moment of peace, Levi spoke again. “After you’re little titan tantrum resulted in a wonderful onslaught of titans, Ackerman and the other two had to tame your ass while I stayed back to kill the fuckers and keep them from chasing after you lot. I did, but you’d gone bat shit crazy and would not stop, slow down, or even turn around for them to get a clear shot at you through the trees. Bunch of worthless ass—anyway,” He covered his shoulders with his cloak, let out a breath, and looked back to Eren. “Once I had managed to catch up with them, they were too busy screaming at you to ‘slow down’ and ‘come back’ to hear what I was saying, so I took it upon myself to cut your ass out on my own. You’re welcome by the way; if you had gotten any closer to the Walls at that speed you would’ve received a cannonball to the face—”

“That doesn’t explain why we’re in a cave—”

“I was getting there, you shit.” Levi grumbled. “As I was saying; when I had finally cut you out, I tried waking you up right away. I told Ackerman and the other two to go back to the Walls and report that you and I would be back a few minutes later, and they went… reluctantly of course. You didn’t respond to any of my kicks,” He shot Eren an annoyed look as if to say what the hell, Jaeger, when I kick you, you should be telling yourself to wake up. “So I had to pick your sleeping-ass up and ended up carrying you halfway through the remainder of the forest because one of my reels was shot and fucked up all to hell. But, oh isn’t this just our fucking luck, Jaeger; without any warning, any sound, not even a quake of some kind, four fucking titans come from seven, maybe six yards in the direction we were going. Obviously, I turned and ran the other way. You were being useless and just as heavy as my gear, which was broken thanks to your fucking stunt, and I had to unhook it to keep up my speed. You didn’t even have yours for whatever fucking reason, so I couldn’t pull together a half-ass, makeshift escape into the trees, and that’s why we’re here. Because they couldn’t get in here, it’s sturdy, and I had carried you for nearly eight miles with those fucking things trailing me. Not to mention your skin felt like the fucking sun. _That’s_ why we’re in a cave.”

It grew silent again; the only sound now was their easy breathing and the rain. Eren watched as Levi’s eyelids drooped several times before shutting completely. He watched in curiosity, wondering if Levi would actually go to sleep in a place so dirty and dusty. He was a soldier, after all, and Eren was sure that the man has slept in worse conditions. However, he pondered, was it really the best time to be sleeping? If they were only about eight miles from the walls, he was sure they could make it back. And it was dark, so the titans would be out of it, wouldn’t they? And Eren could carry Levi in his hands—oh, that’s right. The titans would be “out of it”. All of them, he figured, including shifters like himself. Plus it was raining, so even if Eren would be able to transform, what source of coverage and light would he be able to follow, keep Levi dry, and make it back to the walls? He didn’t even know what direction they had come from.

Eren let out a sigh, dropping his head down against his knees and inhaling the scent of his own sweat and blood, and dirt, again. His skin still burned, but not in a painful sense seeing as the cave had become surprisingly cold, and kept him warm. He didn’t shiver or shake; instead he just sat there, enjoying the feel of his own body heat against the cold rocky wall of the cave.

“You’re not cold at all?” The murmured question coming from Eren’s superior sounded almost concerned, to his surprise, and he looked up. “Because it’s cold as balls in here…”

“Are you cold, sir?”

Levi grumbled. “I am.”

“Do you want my jacket, sir?”

Eren was not aware he was being entirely too generous for his or the Corporals standards, though it would not be taken lightly. “No,” Levi replied coldly. “It’s drenched in your sweat. It’s a wonder that I’m still wearing mine.”

Lifting his head to look at Levi, Eren watched silently as his commanding officer shivered slightly underneath his cloak. The older man’s lips had become a light shade of blue, and Eren saw when he exhaled through his mouth to sigh, the air that escaped through his lips was visible. He realized—as well as felt—that the temperature was declining quickly. Though his skin was still heated and keeping him from shivering, any human could feel the chill.

He took Levi’s shivering as an invitation to crawl over to him and silently drape his arms over the other. He didn’t speak, nor did he respond do the jab to his ribs from Levi’s elbow, or the angry grumbling that sounded vaguely like “get the fuck off of me”.

It wasn’t until Levi stopped fighting him off, however, that he relaxed his arms. He could nearly feel how cold Levi was even through the layers of fabric they both wore. But then, a sigh of silent relief came from the older man as Eren’s body heat began to warm him up. The two of them sat there in perfect silence, Levi in Eren’s arms, nothing but the rain as their soothing soundtrack.

The older man was still shivering, Eren had counted twenty minutes since putting his arms around the man, and he was worried. Examining Levi’s face, he saw that his lips were still blue and eyes were still shut. Was his warmth not enough?

“Hey… Heichou, are you still cold?” Eren asked in a hushed voice, knowing that being too loud whilst sitting against the Corporal would result in some-type of bodily harm.

Levi didn’t answer, nor did he move to shrug, nod, or shake his head as a response. He didn’t even open his eyes. Eren began to panic, gently shaking Levi in attempt to wake him up. 

“Heichou?” He repeated the title, his voice shaking nervously. Still no response. Pulling his arms away from Levi, Eren shifted onto his knees and rose, turning Levi to look at him, hands on either shoulder, and shook him again. “Heichou, please—Levi, please, open your eyes, sigh, groan, punch me, move, something!”

With still no response, Eren pressed his ear against Levi’s bloody shirt, listening for his heartbeat. Sure enough, the Corporals heart was beating just fine, calm, healthy. The rise and fall of his chest against the side of Erens head cause the younger troop to exhale with relief. Though, through the Corporal’s shirt, he could feel Levi’s cool skin. Without thinking, Eren began pulling off his own jacket and placing it over the Levi, stripped out of the belts that covered his chest in order to remove his dirty yet warm shirt.

He moved back into his place beside Levi and wrapped his warm arms around the man once again. He’s just sleeping, Eren told himself. He’s perfectly fine. Just cold. And tired. He’s just sleeping. Feeling Levi shake beneath his arms worried him, but he continued to tell himself that Levi was just sleeping. Because he was! He was breathing, and sleeping. He was cold, but he was breathing. Breathing meant he was alive. Nobody was going to die tonight.

Eren refused himself any sleep for the next hour, counting down each minute by using the raindrops as indication that seconds were passing. Every few minutes, he would look to his superior to see if anything happened—if his lips would return to their light pink, if he would open his eyes, if he would twitch, if he would do anything.

 _I never so adored you._ Levi is a work of art. Eren took in the structure of his face; his jawline, his small nose, his thin brows, his sharp features that you would miss if not looking directly at him. Even in their current blue shade, his lips were perfect. The man still trembled under his arms, though not as badly as before, which made Eren smile. This small man; his small body, his words, his features, his everything. Eren had always felt something toward Levi. It was not only admiration for his leader. Levi was perfect in Eren’s eyes and whether he told himself this or not, he aspired to be like him. Strong, independent, respected, maybe even feared. The boy felt his cheeks burn—not in a bad way—and he moved his right arm from around Levi’s chest, his hand shaking slightly. His fingers lightly grazed Levi’s jaw, then up to his cheek. His fingers trembled at the cool touch and they trailed up to Levi’s cold lips.

 _I'm twisting allegories now._ The man beside him did not move other than how he was already shaking. Eren’s eyes darted up to Levi’s still shut eyes, then back down to his cold lips. He wondered how many times Levi had had to snap at him or others in the last few hours, days, weeks, months, with these perfect lips. They shouldn’t be used for such indecent comments, though everything Levi said, no matter the words or phrases or tone, was soothing to Eren. His deep, strong voice that never sounded weak. His perfect voice.

 _I want to complicate you._ Eren pondered the way Levi went about things. With Eren, Levi always had to throw orders around as though the boy were an untrained dog. But that was how Levi saw him, after all. That was how he convinced the Military Police and the Judge to allow the Corps to take Eren into their custody. “This just my opinion, but when it comes to teaching somebody discipline, I believe pain is the most effective way” and Eren took that as Levi seeing him as a animal that needed to be taught. However, he knew Levi actually cared about him. He wasn’t just another soldier to this man—he couldn’t be! Whether or not Eren was Humanities hope for defeating the titans, Levi saw him as more than a (not so) secret weapon. Which is why he tried so hard, and flawlessly at that, to show Eren the way and to teach him. 

The boys smile faded, his eyes tearing up suddenly at the thought of how it would feel to lose his precious leader—and to what? A wimpy cold? No… Levi was too strong to be taken out by a cold, Eren was sure of it. He cringed, the hot tears streaming down his already burning face. He tried to shake it off; the thought of Levi’s being another body in the pile to burn. No, no! Eren screamed at himself silently, mentally kicking himself, trying to get the thought of his beloved officer dying out of his thoughts. Beloved? …Yes. Eren could finally admit to himself. In this time, at this moment, since the moment they had met and the emotions swelled up endlessly and almost painfully inside of him. Levi was Eren’s beloved. It was a one-sided thing, he was well aware of that. But he loved Levi. He was in love with him. Being half his age, Eren knew the feeling was far from being mutual. But he didn’t care. And yet, the thought returned, beating against Erens emotions with all the force he could bare before he burst into tears and buried his face against Levi’s shoulder. _Don't let me do this to myself._

 _I'm chasing roller coasters._ Eren knew very well how one-sided this was. How could Levi feel anything for him that Eren felt toward him?

 _I've got to have you closer now._ If Levi was going to die here, no matter what Eren did to try to warm him up, did it really matter though? One minute. One chance. One touch. That’s all Eren wanted—no, wanted.

 _Endless romantic stories._ A light chuckle rose from the boy’s lips, smiling through his tears, laughter muffled against Levi’s shoulder. What the hell did anything matter anymore? There was a chance they’d both die here. Eren’s left arm was still injured from something, his ribs still ached, his body still burned (though at the moment it was nothing more than a tingling sensation), his head still pounded. And Levi—was he going to be taken by illness? Eren’s chuckle erupted into deep, loud laughter that was cut short by him placing a small kiss against the fabric of Levi’s cape that covered his shoulder. 

He lifted his head, pulling Levi as close to him as he possibly could without pulling the man into his lap. He placed a kiss on the side of Levi’s head just by his ear, then lifted himself from the ground and shifted to his heels. Before he knew what he was doing, he had moved over and was now straddling his Corporal, his shirtless torso and arms trembling at the touch of Levi’s still chilled skin. His skin wasn’t as cold now, thanks to Erens jacket and shirt, so that was good. And Levi was still breathing, that was good, too. In that moment, nothing mattered except Levi. Nothing mattered except his seemingly unconscious presence. Nothing mattered except that Eren was finally alone with his beloved.

Eren’s hands found their way to the sides of Levi’s face, his right hand tracing curly lines and shapes against the man’s cheek before he interrupted his inkless artwork and leaning toward Levi’s face, eyes closed. _You never could control me._ He felt cold lips against his own warm ones, softer than he had expected. His hands held their place and he lowered himself gently onto Levi’s lap whilst moving his lips into a motionless kiss. Eren was so distracted by what he had finally been able to do after so long, wanting, wishing it would happen, and it finally happening, to feel the man stir. As he had told himself before, nothing mattered except that they were alone. Levi was his now. He refused to moved or part their lips, turning his head to the right and forcing entrance into the Corporals mouth with his tongue. It darted past the man’s teeth and slid across the other’s tongue, and Eren enjoyed the feel and taste of Levi’s mouth a little too much. 

That’s it; he couldn’t stand it any longer. He had to see the face of his beloved; he had to look at his lovely, beautiful Levi. And so he opened his eyes only to be met with a pair of blue-gray ones looking right back at him. Eren froze, staring into Levi’s eyes, and he began calculating the actions and events that took place in the past minute. He had kissed his sleeping superior. He had woken Levi up with said kiss. And he was about to be killed for it, he was sure—

A hand met the back of Eren’s warm neck, and it trailed upward into his hair, forcing Eren’s lips to press harder against Levi’s. 

The older man’s tongue began to wrestle with Eren’s, forcing it back into his own mouth and followed by the other. Eren half-gasped half-whimpered at Levi’s sudden action, slightly shocked as well that he was taking part in the kiss after just waking up. Or was he even sleeping?

Finally, Eren’s head was jerked back by Levi’s hand pulling his hair, and he let out a light groan. Levi’s fingered were intertwined with a fistful of Eren’s dark brown hair, and he jerked again, forcing another groan out of Eren’s throat before he spoke. “Why aren’t you wearing a shirt, brat?”

Levi released his grip on Eren’s hair and dropped his hand to the ground beside him, eyes trailing down the young soldier’s lean and muscled torso, then to his own body to see Eren’s jacket and shirt blanketed over him. The smirk that had appeared on Eren’s face did nothing more than serve its purpose to piss Levi off, and Levi knew exactly that Eren was going to say. 

“Well, you were fucking shivering and looked like you were cold. Next time I won’t give a damn.” Eren mocked.

“Aren’t you fucking hilarious.” Levi mumbled through cold lips. On the bright side, they were slowly returning to their pink color. 

The man continued to shiver, however, and Eren adjusted himself once again beside Levi and in a quick, gentle movement, he pulled the older man back into his arms. Eren was still nice and warm, and to the teen’s surprise, Levi slowly began to curl up in his arms to cuddle up against his warmth. Eren smiled, laying his chin against the top of Levi’s head and shutting his eyes as Levi finished positioning himself comfortably in Eren’s arms.

“Eren,” Levi spoke, his voice somewhat soft.

Slight shock filled Eren again, surprised by the use of his actual name. He didn’t show it, however, keeping his eyes closed, and replied with a light hum.

“You stink. You need to bathe.” Eren laughed, his midriff twitching slightly from his amusement. Levi continued. “Though, I suppose I can let it slide just this once.”

“Thanks,” The younger soldier replied though his laughter. It wasn’t even that funny, but at the same time it was. It lightened the mood.

“Eren,” Levi repeated his name the same as he said it before. “I want you to sleep.”

“Sir?”

“Don’t ‘sir’ me, Jaeger. Sleep. I can feel your muscles. They’re still stiff from earlier.”

“Sir,”

“What the hell is it, Eren?”

“You called me Eren…”

Levi paused and lifted his head from Eren’s chest, sleepy and bored eyes locked onto the younger boy’s lively green ones. “Hm. So I did. That’s your name, isn’t it?”

“It is,” Eren smiled, looking back into the other’s eyes. “But you’ve always called me by my last name, or ‘brat’ or ‘shit’ or some type of combination of those.”

“Would you rather I call you a shitty brat?”

“No, sir.”

“Then shut the fuck up and go to sleep.”

Eren counted the seconds as they turned to minutes until the Corporal fell asleep, and the minutes as they turned into hours while the man slept. Levi’s breathing was a soothing melody that mixed with the rain as he slept, and the boy watched as his superior’s head was lifted and lowered with each of Erens breaths. “I love you, Levi.” He whispered.

 _Fixation or psychosis?_ As much as Eren hated to admit it, his admiration and love for the Corporal was not all he felt. He was in love with this man (and felt as though now that he had finally gotten to kiss him, and was kissed back), no doubt about that, but he knew this fixation with the Corporal, in addition to being in love with him, was merely a blatant obsession. He cringed at the realization, but sighed and lifted his right hand to the back of Levi’s head and gentle stroked the man’s hair. He was in love and obsessed with someone twice his age. And, to be honest, he really didn’t care.

 _Devoted to neurosis now._ The illusion of losing Levi to illness came back, and Eren tried his hardest to fight it off by using the memory of the kiss they shared an hour ago as his weapon. He refused to see Levi on that pile of bodies to be burned in his thoughts, as well as reality. Levi was fine now. His lips weren’t blue, his skin wasn’t chilly to the touch, and his body temperature had gone up since they had shared a kiss. It worked, for the moment, and Eren planted a gentle kiss on the top of Levi’s head, then buried his nose into the older man’s hair and inhaled his scent. He always smelled nice, clean, like Levi. 

Finally, the boy began to dose off, his muscles relaxing slowly while he fell into a slumber of his own to match Levi’s. Despite sitting in an upright position against the rough wall of the cave and the constant pain in his left arm that he’d been ignoring for the past two hours, he slept without issue.


	2. A Trek Well Spent and a Good Night to Follow

Sunlight snuck its way into the opening of the cave and assaulted Eren’s eyelids. The boy allowed them to lightly flutter open, his vision blurred slightly from sleep. He slowly lifted his arms up from around the still slumbering body of his commanding officer, and stretched them. Then after popping each of his knuckles and wrists, his neck, and letting out a long yawn.

“Alright, Levi,” He whispered, lifting the older man from his lap and adjusting his position, laying Levi on the ground gently and taking back his shirt and jacket. After redressing himself, belts and all, he pulled Levi back into his arms and kissed the sleeping man’s forehead, then pulled away to watch him stir.

Those beautiful gray eyes locked onto Eren’s lightly flushed cheeks once opened, and after a moment to adjust they found the boys own eyes. He opened his mouth for a morning greeting but before any words could be spoken, Eren pulled him into a kiss. Levi was reluctant to kiss back, but did so. However, he refused his charge entrance, and pulled away before either of them could really enjoy themselves. “I just woke up. Don’t do that before I brush my teeth.”

Was that permission to do it otherwise? Eren told himself it was.

The two of them discussed silently how long it would take to get back to the Walls without use of their gear, deciding that they would talk most of the way and save their energy for running only when, and if, they were being chased down by titans. By the time they had left the cave, the sun was high up in the sky. 

“Noon? Doesn’t feel like it…”

“That’s because you woke up half an hour ago.”

Conversations weren’t Levi’s forte and Eren didn’t expect him to change that or any other aspect about himself anytime soon (or at all), so he just nodded the two of them kept on their trek back to the Walls. The teen thought about how Levi had told him that they were eight miles from home, and he let out a sigh. The long walk ahead of them would take the whole day if they kept up this pace, and he wanted to get back soon and show Mikasa and Armin he was okay. He wanted to eat something, too, seeing as he hadn’t had any food since breakfast the previous day. Come to think of it, he was sure that Levi was hungry too. His own stomach growled at the thought of food and he began slowing his pace, his gaze drifting from the field ahead of them down to his hands.

“Oi, Eren, what’s slowing you?” Levi slowed his own pace and turned to look over his shoulder at the younger boy. He stopped completely when he saw Eren bring his hand up to his mouth, turned in a half-circle and grasped the boy’s wrist which made him flinch, and Levi forcefully lowered Eren’s hand from his parted lips. “What the hell are you thinking, shitty brat?”

“I was thinking… if I go titan, I can carry you and we can get back to the Walls faster. We could make it there in like… a third of the time that we would on human feet.”

“No.” The word came out harsh, and as he spat it out, his grip on Eren’s wrist tightened. “You’re not going titan, not after what happened yesterday. That’s the whole reason we’re in this mess in the first place.”

“But… I won’t lose control this time, Levi.”

“You say that _every_ fucking time, Eren, but you do. Your goal is never clear enough for you to stop rampaging once you’ve achieved what you wanted to do. What was your goal yesterday? Do you even remember? No, I’m sure you don’t because you rarely use that brain of yours. I’m sure it’s fucking covered in cobwebs and dust, and that’s one thing I am not able to clean for you, brat.”

“But Levi—”

“I am your commanding officer, Jaeger. I expect you to address me as such.”

Eren was hurt. After what had happened the night before; all the compassion and concern, and now it was just gone? “Heichou—”

“I’m tired of talking.” He threw Eren’s wrist from his hold and took the lead again. “Move your fucking ass.”

Would it just end there? Yes, it would. Eren didn’t want an argument to erupt in the middle of almost-nowhere, not while they were hungry, not even at all. He really just wanted to hold Levi in his arms again the way he had that night; securely, to keep him warm. Levi had acted so different that night, too. He was concerned for the younger boy’s health, asking if he was cold and telling him to sleep, and out of consideration for his own wellbeing, had given a sleeping, shaking Eren his cloak to keep him warm even when the boy felt as though his skin were on fire. The man cared, and now Eren didn’t understand why he was being such a jerk. Though, Levi was right. It was Eren’s fault that they had to spend the night in the cave. But he wanted to make it up to the Corporal, and if getting them back to the Walls faster was the way to do it, he should be allowed to turn into a titan.

They had managed to make it four miles in an hour, and though they were both silently pleased with the progress their aching legs had made, their stomachs got louder with each minute that passed. Levi had refused each time Eren suggested they take a break, and had given him the dirtiest stare physically possible when Eren had said something about being weak from hunger. “You are well fed, and more importantly, you are a soldier.” Levi had said. “You are supposed to be able to undergo experiences worse than ‘being a little hungry’, so stop complaining like a stupid child. The sooner you quit blabbing, the sooner I can stop getting distracted by your shitty questions, and the sooner we will be back at the Walls.” And that was the last thing either of them had spoken about until an hour’s worth of walking had gone by.

“Heichou my legs are aching. Can we please, please take a break? Just for a minute?”

“For the love of all that is silent and clean in the world—just shut the fuck up and sit down. You get sixty seconds. If you aren’t up by the time one minute passes, I am kicking your face into that tree and leaving you here.”

Gladly taking to the ground, Eren stretched his legs out in front of him and leaned against a big-ass tree trunk. He let out a breath of relief just as a breeze of cool air blew over them. That adorably goofy and rare smile that Eren was known for back in Shinganshina graced his lips. It’d been a while since he’d felt so relaxed, which was strange seeing as he had less than a minute to do so. Though, when the sixty seconds passed, the only thing Levi had done was sit beside Eren and bow his head with his hands folded in his lap.

It was times like this when they were alone together, Eren felt, anything could be shared. And he knew it to be true, too, for during the entire time that they had walked, he had contemplated the reason Levi had acted so differently from his usual defiant and sassy disposition. Nobody was there to judge his character except for Eren. That’s why Levi was so calm and careful and almost kind to the boy last night. Eren knew that had to be it.

“Heichou? Are you still angry at me?”

There was a long pause before Levi spoke; his voice was gentle again like it had been that night. “I wasn’t angry at you, brat. You misunderstand things so fucking easily.”

“Then elaborate, sir.”

Levi lifted his head to look at Eren, his eyebrows furrowed and his grey-blue eyes glaring holes into Eren’s. “Elaborate?” Eren nodded. “You fucking shit… Alright. Do you remember what I said before I—the Recon Corps, I mean—got custody of you? How I had told you, and everybody, that if you lost control I’d not hesitate to kill you?”

Another pause. Eren cringed at the memory, feeling a random pain in the back of his neck, then nodded. “Yes?”

“I don’t want to have to do that, Eren. I don’t want you to lose your fucking control and have me kill you because you’re a mindless fuck inside of that titan. I really don’t want to have to do that, and if you go titan and aren’t focused, which ‘getting us to the Walls quickly’ is not a stable goal, mind you, that could cause so much damage that you aren’t even fucking aware of. And I do not plan on losing another loved one—friend—comrade—fuck it, whatever you want to be called, I do not plan on losing another one of you to this fucking war.”

Eren needed a moment for all of that to sink in. Just a minute. Just a little bit of time. And time seemed to be all they had, or so Eren had hoped. In fact, he had felt now that time was standing still and only he and Levi were capable of doing anything in the frozen space. The movement was swift and he did it in an almost unconscious state; turned toward the tree and half-jumped, half-slid over to the side until he sat over Levi, straddling him the same as he had done that night. Levi didn’t react by shoving Eren off or even shooting him some type of disgusted, approving look, but instead he lifted his hands and rested them against the younger soldier’s shoulders.

“How did you do this to me you fucking brat…”

“What?” Eren’s brows slowly rose, showing his concern and confusion. “I don’t understand—”

“I know you don’t, you always misunderstand things, Eren. We’ve already established that.”

“What did you mean, though? What did I do?”

It was very faint, barely visible, but Eren saw Levi smile at his question. The most beautiful man gracing Eren with the first smile he’d made in a while—a long, long while—and this made Eren’s heart beat viciously against his ribcage. The boy’s cheeks became flushed and his eyes locked onto Levi’s, feeling his face heat up made him almost uncomfortable, but he refused to show it for fear that Levi would assume it was his fault (which it was, kind of, but it wasn’t a bad thing).

Instead of answering the younger boy’s question, Levi closed his eyes and fell back into a relaxed state. His grip on Eren’s shoulders tightened and the teen took that as permission to lean into the older man, eyes closed. 

Though the sun was out and shining all over, there was still a chill assaulting the world around them. Eren’s breath was warm against the Corporals lips before their soft lips met each other. Much to the teen’s surprise, Levi did kiss him back, and their lips mirrored each other’s movements. The younger soldier’s lips parted and his tongue begged entrance, and to his disappointment, Levi broke away just as Eren’s tongue grazed his bottom lip. He opened his eyes to plead wordlessly, his senses completely blocking everything not Levi-related, until he examined the serious expression on the man’s face. Then he heard it, and felt it.

Beneath them, the ground shook and the two of them froze. This was unlike Levi, Eren whimpered inwardly, to just sit there when the warning signs of an approaching titan became apparent. Though, that thought was thrown into the trash along with any hope that remained for Eren to keep kissing his beloved Corporal when Levi shoved the boy off of his lap and stood, then pulled Eren up by his hair.

“We’ve wasted so much time on resting, damn it all,” Levi took Eren’s left wrist in his hand and pulled the boy along with him as they ran away from the direction the quaking, giant footsteps were arriving in—the way they had come. Eren’s entire left arm still ached, and being pulled by his wrist was not helping it any, though he was not one to complain and he would keep his mouth shut about it.

“I’m sorry—”

“I don’t want to hear another word from you until we’re inside the Walls.” Levi hissed, and that was that.

Whatever type of titan was following them wasn’t running too quickly (and they couldn’t see it, so wherever it was they were assuming it couldn’t see them either), so they were able to keep a steady pace without having to speed up into a sprint. Through the crisp air and the breezes that washed over them as they ran, Levi released his grip on Erens wrist and despite their height difference Eren could not keep up with the shorter man.

The quakes got larger and longer lasting, and louder as well. More titans were joining the one that had begun its chase for Eren and Levi, Corporal estimating two or three in addition to the one that had caused them to run in the first place.

“Pick up your feet, Jaeger!” Levi shouted without looking over his shoulder to the boy. He knew Eren was there, behind him, but not how far behind him that the teen was. And it was almost as if it were on cue, right as the words left his mouth that a titan emerged from the trees at his left.

Grabbing Levi by the back of his cloak and pulling the man into his arms, Eren didn’t regret the jerking the man off his feet if it had meant saving his life. He hadn’t intended it to seem like an embrace, and he wouldn’t stay like that for long. The teen let out a breath of relief as the titan in front of them crashed face-first into the trunk of a big ass tree.  
The two of them quickly moved around the titan and continued to run, now breaking into their long awaited and dreaded sprint. “Heichou, please, just let me—”

“Damn it, Eren, I said _no!_ ” Levi nearly growled. “How many times do I have to tell you ‘no’ before it gets through your thick skull and registers?!”

Heavy and rushed step-quakes of the titans behind them began to get closer. The two humans were in no way capable of outrunning these freaks of nature, and Eren knew he must disobey the captain’s orders if they wished to survive; if they wished to get home. If he wished to keep his beloved from deaths grasp.

Eren always took the consequences of his actions seriously until this very moment. He didn’t care if Levi got angry at him; Eren was doing this for Levi, to protect him, because he loved him. _I will protect you; I swear on my life that I will protect you, Levi._ Against orders, he lifted his hand to his mouth when Levi had gotten more than two paces ahead of him. “Heichou, I’m sorry.”

“What—” Levi cut himself off, turning to see Eren dig his teeth into the soft flesh of his thumb. “Eren, no!—”

The pain of his teeth was masked, quickly replaced by intense, suffocating heat as Eren felt himself be lifted, drifting into a body that was his, and yet not his own, and being taken into a state that was not quite past unconscious. He forgot everything except his goal as always when in his titan, and turned to prepare himself and get ready to attack the four titans that had been chasing after then. Each of them was his exact size, yet no match for his strength.

Erens’ titan’s fist broke clean through first closest titan’s jaw, and once pulling his arm back out and watching the body fall, his goal echoed almost violently in his head. _Protect the Corporal. Protect Levi. Protect your beloved._ In a swift motion, Eren half-crouched, swiping Levi up roughly in his right hand, keeping a firm yet gentle grip on the man as he turned again and thrust his left elbow into the chest cavity of the next titan to approach. Its blood spurted up and fell like rain against Eren’s titan body and Levi’s face and left arm that hung out of Eren’s hold. 

The other two titans were close enough for Eren to attack, but Levi began shouting commands at him that he could not ignore. “To the Walls, Eren! To the fucking Walls! Keep going straight, just fucking run, you fucking shit!” _The safety of the Walls would protect his beloved,_ Eren told himself. _Protect Levi. Get him to the Walls._

With half a sharp turn he began racing through the rest of the forest of big-ass trees, leaving the titan duo in his dust. Levi, still securely in his grip, seemed almost surprised that he was not being flung around like some rag doll. He was also surprised at how well Eren’s titan was doing at following the command, despite the idiot human inside of it that had completely disregarded the order to not transform in the first place.

Finally, they broke out of the sea of trees and Levi could was relieved to see the field before them, and the Walls in the distance. Now all they had to do was make it through Maria and get into Rose. He hoped—though this hope hung on a small thread—that those standing on the Walls with the canons would have enough sense to save their ammo for a titan worth the trouble—or, rather, a titan that was not Eren.

Nearly to the Rose now, Levi’s could feel the blood of the previous titan burn slightly on his skin as it evaporated. He ignored it, watching almost in awe at how serious yet relaxed Erens’ titan’s face was as he ran. His legs barely dangled from between its fingers and the palm of the titan’s hand. Levi was tired, and hungry, and dirty, _and dirty,_ and though he was still angry at Eren for going against his orders and transforming, he was also a bit pleased with how much time they had made up.

Approaching Rose felt almost like a dream, though Eren did have to fight off several titans to get close to the bricks. It was three, maybe four in the afternoon that they had finally gotten back. Levi looked up, wishing Eren’s titan could reach the top of Rose, or that he had his working gear with him so that they could scale the wall and get back inside. Sadly, neither of those things was an option, and the older man sighed. He ordered Eren to set him down and not to move a single inch until told otherwise, and Eren didn’t move. Levi wandered around a few yards away from Eren before hearing the clip-clop of horses’ hooves. Looking around, he saw Hanji riding toward him, her gear strapped on, and that was almost a sight to make him smile. Almost.

“Levi! Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?” She cooed, bringing her horse to a halt in front of the short man. “Even though you look like hell in the flesh—haha!”

He rolled his eyes at her laughter. “I could almost say the same to you, shitty glasses. Give me your gear for a second, I have to cut the brat out of his—”

“Ereeeeeeeeeeeeeen!” Hanji gasped, her eyes sparkling with delight when locking onto the titan a small ways away from Levi. She hopped off her horse and clapped her hands together, nearly drooling with anticipation, and stood beside Levi. “You’re a titan! Oh boy, oh, can I touch you?” She called out to him excitedly. He was incoherent to her question, only staring down at her and Levi with deep green eyes.

Annoyed, Levi reached upward and grabbed Hanji by her messy ponytail. “Oi, Hanji, give me your fucking maneuvering gear. I need to cut Eren out.”

“Ouch—hey, why don’t you let me do it? And where’s your gear anyway?”

“Damn it woman, would you just—”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m unhooking it, just let go of my hair, grumpy.” Levi released his fistful of her hair and she undid her gear, and handed it to him so he could hook it up. As he did so, Hanji skipped like a child over to Eren’s titan and examined the skin on his legs before stepping back. “Oh, jeez, got in a few fights with the other titans, eh? Don’t worry ‘bout that. Hey, so,” She turned back to Levi and strode toward him while she spoke. “It was freezing last night; we all had to get extra quilts for our beds. How’d you two manage to survive in the rain?”

“Don’t ask me stupid questions, shitface.” He replied coldly, uncomfortably getting accustomed to her gear before walking past her and in shouting range of Eren. “I’m going to cut you out now, be ready!” 

With no response from the titan boy, Levi turned and shot the hooks of Hanji’s gear up into Rose’s sturdy structure, and hopped out onto Eren’s shoulder, unsheathing the blades from their places, putting them back after examining them and then retracting the hooks from their hold into the wall. 

“Lean forward a little, arch your neck so I don’t fall off your back.” It took Eren a moment to register the command, but he did as he was told and arched his neck as though he were looking down. Taking small steps across the titans shoulder before grabbing onto the hair that hung long on Eren’s titans head as security, Levi then shot the hooks into the back of the titans head and drew the blades once more, slicing Eren out quickly and pulling the boy’s body from the bloody mess before shooting into the wall whilst the unneeded titan host fell to the wreckage below it.

Scaling down with an unconscious Eren barely secured over his shoulder, Levi landed with flat feet and made his way over to Hanji who was now mounting her horse again.

“You take him,” Levi lifted Eren up onto the back of Hanji’s horse, making sure he wouldn’t fall, and stepped away. “I’ll give you your gear back when I get there.”

“Got’cha,” She nodded and rode off slowly to keep Eren from rolling off the back of her horse.

Levi watched as Hanji and Eren disappeared back inside wall Rose and began scaling up the wall again, making his way to the Corps HQ as complicated for his hungry, tired, dirty self as he possibly could.

It took quite a while longer than he had expected, but he got back just before the sun began setting. His aching feet, his growling stomach, his sticky body; Levi felt like shit. Stepping inside the HQ, he was greeted by Hanji who had been waiting for him.

“Took you long enough.” She teased.

“Shut the fuck up.” He spat, then ran his fingers through his hair, stopping his fingers at his undercut and dropping his hand back to his side. “Where’s Eren? Has he woken up?”

“Yeah, and he’s eating. You should be too. I’ll tell Erwin you’re back, you go eat.” She ran off without giving him time to respond. Hanji always seemed so full of energy, and Levi didn’t understand how. Well, he really didn’t give a fuck how.

He made his way to the mess hall, eyes scanning the room until they stopped on Eren, who was scarfing down every morsel of food on his plate. Around him were the other rookies from the 104th trainee squad, no doubt questioning him about the night he had spent in the cold outside. Ignoring the urge to go and slap the boy for disobeying his orders (which Levi refused to admit he began forgiving Eren for), he went to get himself something to eat and sat at a table all by himself, eating quietly and not making a mess out of his food.

Not intending to eavesdrop—though Eren’s loud-ass friends sure made it easy—Levi made out a few of the questions that they were prodding at the boy with: “You couldn’t have made a fire right?” “Where did you sleep?” “Did you have to cuddle to stay warm?” Whoever asked that got a sharp kick or jab to some body part because shortly after the question was asked, a sharp whine followed it. Though, through the sea of questions Eren was receiving, Levi never heard him answer. Good, the boy kept it all to himself. That or he’s stuffing his face and knows how disgusting it is to talk with your mouth full.

Finally as the group around Eren receded into his regular trio of himself, Armin, and Mikasa, the mess hall had grown quiet. Levi had finished his plate, be he refused to leave until he heard Eren blab about the previous night’s events. However, to the man’s surprise, Eren did not say one word about how he had kept Levi warm, or how they had kissed—though, it was a long shot that they would believe something as crazy, yet true, as that—or anything. Eren yawned and told the two that he would probably head off to bed soon, and before they left they both told him to keep warm, seeing as it would be another chilly one. He thanked them for their concern and they both exited, and once it was just Eren and Levi in the mess hall, Levi stood, leaving his empty plate, and made his way over to the teen.

Eren saw Levi approach him and he flinched. “Sir—Heichou—I… please don’t be angry at me. I know you said not to, but I just wanted to get back here—”

“I know, Eren.”

“—and I understand if you are angry, but you have to see… wait, what?”

“I said I know. You went against my orders for the good of both of us. Honestly, the two of us would have probably become titan food if you hadn’t disregarded my orders. So, I supposed I should thank you. I won’t, but I should.”  
Wanting to laugh but knowing it would be better to hold it back, Eren nodded. “Yes, sir.”

Levi lifted his hand and Eren flinched when the older man’s hand made contact with the top of his head, and blushed lightly when it gently patted him as if to say ‘well done, Eren.’ A smile graced the boy’s face but quickly disappeared when Levi’s fingers intertwined in his hair, grabbing a fistful and jerking Eren’s head back slightly. Levi didn’t have to go far to meet the boy’s lips with his own and the kiss was small and short, but meant more than words could.

It was broken before it could even begin to build anything more than a flustered whimper from Eren, who wanted more than what he was just given, and he watched as Levi began making his way out of the mess hall. 

He paused halfway toward the door, his back to Eren, and he whispered just enough for Eren to hear if he was _really_ listening. “I was informed it was going to be another cold night… you should come spend the night with me in my quarters. It’s much warmer than your dingy cell.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 5:42 a.m. on Monday. Thank God I don't have school today.

**Author's Note:**

> At least I know this one will be over with by the next chapter~


End file.
